scared!

This past weekend was one of the most heartbreaking experience I've ever had since becoming a mom. Nathan had cough starting Thursday and by Friday night he had fever. I thought nothing of it since I figure its the flu season so that might be the case. We went to Blythe to visit my mom and pick up recyles since Nathan collects them for some moolah to put in his very big bank account.

Starting Friday night when we arrived in Blythe, he had 103.2 fever. I gave him Motrin and a cough medication. He continously had fever throughout Saturday. His coughing was really bad. Once he starts coughing it seems like he has a hard time stopping. Then came Sunday when were supposed to leave town for Chino Hills. In the morning we got invited by a family friend to a birthday party. Unfortunately we all took naps and lost track of time. Got to the party, ate too much Filipino food and head back to my moms to get ready for our trip. However, we left the party too late and I just did not feel safe driving at 8 pm in the evening with just me and Nathan. That decision was probably a Gods blessing because 15 minutes after I made that decision something happened to Nathan. My mom called me out because Nathan had a nosebleed. I thought nothing of it because sometimes he does gets nosebleeds especially if he has a cold (his nose gets dry quickly). But then his nose kept bleeding. Blood was gushing out of his nostril and I panicked. What made it even worst was a few minutes after a clot came out of his nose. It looked like a giant fat worm (thats how long it was) came out of his nostril. By then I was yelling at my mom in panicked. On our way to the hospital more blood came out and more clots came out. At that point I just look up to God and ask him to take care of my son because I can't. I never felt so helpless in my life. A million scenarios came to mind and trying to block negative thoughts otherwise I'd loose it and boohoo the entire time. Anways, we got to the ER (its always a perk when your mom works there as a nurse) and was seen right away. While waiting for the doctor Nathan coughed and low and behold came this marble size clot again. By then I look at my younger sister with despair trying to hold back tears. They did blood work, urine sample, and xrays. It turns out he was super dehydrated, his hemoglobin level was ultra low (probably from the nosebleed), high levels of monocytes (which shows he has an infection), and xrays showed he has bronchitis. My heart sank but glad it wasn't something serious. The gave him an IV, two antibiotics and some Tylenol because his fever was at 104. We stayed at the hospital until 3/4 in the morning. I was beyond exhausted and my mom was like super mom because she pretty much did it all.

Today, it was a bit slow. Still had fever but he was in no mood to do anything other than lay in bed. However, he had nosebleeds again but not as severe compare to last night. I'm still worried. Tomorrow we are heading back to home and the only thing that put my mind at ease is the access to the many top Children's Hospitals in the country (CHLA, Mattel, and CHOC). I pray to God nothing happens on the road ...

4 going on 14

These days I feel like I must have slept for 10 years, woke up and my son is now a budding teenager. I missed a decade of memories or rather blindsided by the idea that my son is no longer a "baby". It seemed like it happen so fast. I woke up and there it is - everything I say goes from one ear and out the other . The child does not even budge with one nice request. It has to be repeated over and over again. I don't know about you but that can get annoying for awhile. And I'm only human so sometimes my patience is not at its best. I feel like a bad mom or want to run to the library and read up about teenagers and how to deal with them. I remember reading on "What to Expect when you're Expecting" book and the toddler years version. It seems everyone has an idea about the terrible twos but those weren't so terrible on my end. Until three came along follow by four. Now its even more challenging because they start to think for themselves. They go to school and start making friends. It seem everything has to have reasons wither its setting the table or even brushing teeth. No logical reason from mom no action to fullfill from son. sigh! I am preplexed by this stage/point in time. I only have one child and for those that have more than one I commend your bravery and love it takes to do it all day in and day out. Right now I am a SAHM and I am surprised how time flies by so fast yet you're not even done with your list of to do's. Its breakfast, drop off Nate at school then before you know it time to pick him up and then dinner. Then there is that I-hope-it-goes-well-without-a-hitch bedtime. Moms out there can agree that bedtime can test even the most patient moms. I do not expect anything, I simply try to be optimistic..(i.e. I cross my fingers).

I am reading up on discipline, ways to communicate with children in a way that is not going to make me loose my mind. !

3 AM ??

I should be panicking right now about now. In 6.5 hours I'm supposed to deliver 28 red velvet cupcakes decked out in Valentines musheness to my son's preschool class. Yah i know I'm nuts to even decide on cupcakes. But I thought it shouldn't be a problem since I am a SAHM and what can we be possibly doing...right??? right!!!!!!

Anways that ranting is for another day, another time. Back to the panicking part...argh!!!! okay I'm good. *yoga breaths* yoga breaths*yoga breahts* Soo, in about an hour I'll be making cupcakes running on 2 hours of sleep, prepping Nate for school, do laundry (oh yes I'm hardcore), and then just maybe nap. (so this is the part where all the SAHM with babies at home gives me the *@#$%^&*)

.....later for now

acckkkkk!

the chaos has began folks. Nursing school applications are just around the corner. I didn't realize that some schools deadline where just a few weeks away. And some requires my high school transcript! What the?? High school is soooo last century!! (kidding!) Anyway now I must drive to Blythe and request it. *sigh*

Recently I took in a new hobby, sewing. I've been sewing almost everyday that my husband thinks its turning into an addiction. I must say he's probably right. Besides the fact that there is not a time that I go to a fabric store and not come out with anything. Sad to say I have stack and stacks of fabric. My latest project is sewing little girl dresses for my niece Sarah. Since I've been blessed with a boy I cannot satisfy my itch to make those cute little girl dresses. One of my good friend is having a girl this May so that might be another little girl to have in mind.

Must get ready for our drive to Blythe!!

Disneyland

We finally went to Disneyland yesterday. Much to Will's dismay he had to come too. He's not particularly fond of Disneyland like Nathan and I. So getting him to go with us when we all know he'd rather be sleeping is a moment to be reckon with. We decided to let Nathan nap late so he can stay up for the fireworks at 9:25 pm. He napped way to long and had to scramble getting ready so we at least get there at a decent time. The drive from our house to D-land is only 20 minutes minus traffic. So we arrived at a decent time and actually saw the "Year of a Million Dreams" parade. Of course having premier annual pass Nathan has seen it a dozen times but for some amazing reason he watches the parade to amazement as if he never seen it before. My child is one true Disney fan. (of course much to Will's delight).

So we :

• watched the parade
• rode Astroblaster
• ate dinner at Plaza Inn
• watch fireworks
• rode the carousel
• Peter Pan Flight
• Mr. Toad's Wild Ride
• Its a Small World

and then went home.

its over..

at least my finals. As its known in my family I've been in school for centuries. On when I'm going to finish God only knows. Although if you ask him he probably say he doesn't know either it all depends on me. But lets not focus on that for a moment. Yesterday I took my last final for my last pre-requisite for the nursing program. I'm relieved its over and a new process is going to begin soon. Come February I'll be frantic filling out application after application because nursing school applications are ridiculous. Waiting list, lottery, GPA, blah blah blah...the list goes on. I swear they should just have a standard acceptance guideline for the state of California that way its fair and square>